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Esilenna Loves |
Read me like an open book then tore me apart.
Monday, August 9, 2010
I've been on very bad mood swings lately. It's as if I'm menopausal or something. Adeline's boyfriend came over today to teach me some stuff. Mainly psychological stuff. I have to say, he's really quite good at it. If he were ever to retire from being a doctor, he should totally become a psychaitrist or maybe a inspirational talker. The way his brain works is just really rather amazing. It's as if he has a CPU in there or something. Well, though I didn't start of liking him, for fear he'd take away my godsis. He really proved to be otherwise. Though he may not look it, but he's really rather reliable as a man. I think Adeline's safe with him on the aspect. The fact that he plans things before hand and stuff like that guarantees their future together. So, I really have to say she's lucky cause after having a 5 hour talk with him today, I realise that he really loves her. So, it's all good. It'd be even better if I can have my own happiness as well. I feel like having someone to rely on these days. Cause the water current feels really strong and I'm afraid that I might not be able to brave it alone. According to him, I might have been under a certain medical condition for a long time(maybe 10 years?) but didn't know it. It's only after today that I have realised but it's all about will power and the desire to get out of that situtation. The best thing he told me today was that, "if there's no commitment in doing something, it just means you got stood up." Hell yeah he was right.I'm really grateful for my bestie. Cause when I'm feeling upset, she knows exactly how I feel and sometimes react to the situtation much stronger than I did which really makes me feel comforted somehow. Knowing someone for so long somehow makes the relationship stronger, cause they know you better and feel what you feel. Though it doesn't always work this way, but for me and my nutty, it does. I've known her for erm... 11 years close to 12( we met at age 7) and now we're besties. I do feel what she feels and she feels what I feel though maybe not all the time but most of the time. We may be blunt to each other at times cause we really know what we can say. Like for example if I like a guy and she thinks the guy's a jerk, she'll tell me and we'll talk about it and see where it goes from there. Vice versa. I guess that maybe what makes our friendship strong. I've been complaining to her alot lately, haha, sorry nutty but thanks so much for making me feel so much better. *Hugs*
I'm only left with one month to my exam, wait, actually, it's really much less than a month. Have to work hard for the best that I can do. Cause so far, my "best" hasn't even been my best yet. I can't afford to be not movtiavted or anything right now. Not at this point of time. Not now. I'm overloaded with my own problems right now. It's already close to the fight or flight mode. Need to perk myself up and bring myself up to greater heights.
吃得苦中苦方为人上人